Zero Contact: The Balm Of Emotional Dependence

Although it may seem difficult and even if we experience relapses, severing all contact with the person on whom we depend will be beneficial in overcoming this emotional dependence and getting started to value us.

Emotional addiction  causes us to attach ourselves to someone out of fear of being alone or of not finding someone else. Therefore, the practice of zero contact in these circumstances is more than recommended.

Sometimes this type of addiction causes us to choose partners who can harm us. Psychological or physical abuse, manipulation, lies, infidelity …

However, this also may not be the case.

What needs to be clear is that any relationship based on emotional dependence on the other is toxic.

Emotional addiction or “I can’t live without you”

The fear of being alone can make us believe that we cannot live without the other person. However, in reality, this is not true.

If the other person leaves us, leaves and abandons us, there is no way to come back with them. What do we do then? We start a new relationship immediately.

People who are afraid of being alone and dependent on others do so because they believe that is the only way they can be happy. Their self-esteem is so low that their life and personality is that of the person they become attached to.

Therefore, when a rupture occurs, they feel empty. They haven’t taken care of themselves, they don’t know what they like or what their dreams are. They are lost.

The reason they are so attached to someone is not that they consider it to be for life or that without that person they cannot live. It is because they cannot live alone!

Therefore, it is normal for them to accumulate relationships one after another. All of them fail, but they don’t know why. The reason is that they choose their partner based on need, not because they feel real love.

Unhappiness and dissatisfaction as well as repeating the same type of romantic relationship is what makes these people need professional help.

The recommendation? Zero contact.

The importance of zero contact in emotional dependence

When a psychologist recommends that a person practice zero contact with the person on whom they depend, it seems impossible.

Thinking about blocking WhatsApp , not answering her calls or saying “no” to her if she calls us, seems something impossible to achieve.

Sometimes the person can feel very guilty, because they fall into their own trap, and then they feel bad. The kind of addictive relationship she maintains doesn’t make her happy and she knows it.

Indeed, a dependent person has moments of lucidity in which he says to himself “I must go”, “I would be better alone than with this person”, “this person hurts me”.

However, this force which can invade her at certain times can cause her to relapse in other circumstances to lead her back on the wrong path.

Patience, will and time

Getting out of emotional dependence even by practicing zero contact is not something that happens overnight.

As with any other addiction, it takes time and patience, as there will be relapses. We will be able to overcome zero contact and we will have taken a step forward.

This approach will help us to become more aware of this dependence. And to realize that we are not well if we continue on the same path. Its very important.

All emotionally dependent people experience relapses and stumble upon the same stone until they manage to make those moments of lucidity more and more present.

When the time comes, after a period of battling our own demons, this practice can completely open our eyes and allow us to make a decision that will undoubtedly be beneficial.

Get out of this addiction

We can get out of emotional dependence. It is enough to get rid of the beliefs that make us believe that without a partner, we fail or that we cannot be happy.

Once we get a foot outside of the tendency to re-enter addictive relationships, we can begin to love and respect each other. In order to establish healthy relationships in which we do not depend on or need others.

To be happier, you have to learn to be optimistic. It’s not about never seeing anything bad. But knowing how to bring out something positive in each adverse situation and reaffirm yourself as a capable person.